This week my students wrote an essay in which they argued that they should be allowed to chew gum in school. They had to pull evidence from a pair of articles that I provided from CNN and The Guardian. Argument writing has been our focus this quarter, and with the quarter winding down, I wanted to see how well they could craft an argument on their own.
One student in particular did a phenomenal job of creating a well-organized essay, which is such an accomplishment for her because she entered my 7th grade class reading at a 3rd grade level. For her to be able to complete this task is nothing short of huge. I had to pass this information along to her mother. Here is a transcript of our conversation:
Me: I wanted to let you know how proud I am of Nakia for her work on her argumentative essay this week. She worked really hard, and she put together a great piece of writing that used several pieces of strong supporting evidence that supported her claim.
Me: I’m just so proud of how much growth she has shown this year as both a reader and writer.
Parent: So…this is a good call?
Me: Yes! Definitely a good call.
Parent: Oh, that’s so nice to hear! I thought maybe she hadn’t gotten something done in class.
Me: No, no, no. She’s doing fine.
Parent: That’s really nice to hear.
Unfortunately, this scenario is not uncommon. I try my best to call home whenever students reach milestones in my class, whether they finish a book, write an amazing essay or just improve upon their behavior. For the most part, these calls are met with uncertainty because the parents at my school generally assume that if they are getting a call from the school, their child has done something wrong.
Now, I make my fair share of parent phone calls home when my students aren’t meeting my expectations, either academically or behaviorally. I’m sure, like most teachers, I make way more phone calls home of this variety. The student that disrupts the learning environment in my room is going to get a call home that day; the other twenty-something kids who come to class and attempt to do everything I ask of them will not. Obviously, there’s not enough time in the day to call all of our student’s parents regularly to discuss positives or negatives. It just isn’t happening. But we must make time to have those positive discussions with parents when their children are succeeding at school. Here’s why:
Positive phone calls build currency with students
Teaching is all about relationships. Teachers that have strong relationships with their students are going to have classes where those students are engaged and ready to take the academic risks that are necessary for true learning to occur. Making a good call home for a student when it is warranted is an important step in cultivating that teacher-student relationship. It rewards the student for his or her accomplishment, and it shows the student that you value that accomplishment so much that you wanted to share the good news with someone at home. Students will work hard for that sort of praise. Plus, a teacher that makes a positive phone call home for a student now has currency that he or she can use when they might have to make a phone call home to discuss a transgression. Students, like their parents, naturally presume that a call home means that they’ve done something wrong. When a student knows that his or her teacher calls home to discuss both the good and the bad, that student will see that their teacher is invested in them.
Positive phone calls improve parent-teacher relationships
Being a parent of a student who struggles at school has to be difficult. Getting phone calls to discuss poor grades or behavioral shortcomings cannot be easy. As teachers, we all have those students that are regularly not meeting the expectations of our classroom, and if you are like me, you spend a decent amount of time on the phone with those parents. I believe it’s critical to make parents aware of what their child is doing in my class when that child is not performing well. If I were the parent of that child, I’d want to know. However, having these discussions is not a simple process because emotions are involved. Whenever I call home to let a parent know that his or her child had a slip-up behaviorally or academically, I am cognizant of the fact that I am speaking to someone who loves this student for better or worse.
However, when I make a genuine positive phone call home for those same struggling students, it begins to change the narrative of my relationship with that parent. They see that I am not just another teacher that focuses on all of the negative attributes of their child. Those positive phone calls show those parents that I celebrate the positive contributions that their child is making to the class as well, and that communication can be transformative. The parent sees that I am observing their child fairly. They know that I care about their child’s well-being. It’s a big step in fostering a relationship with that parent that says to their child that the parent and I are on the same team.